Reading and Relevance

I had a dream about unschooling last night.  Well, it wasn't so much a dream, with pictures or things happening, as it was my mind processing some thoughts.

Something that comes up frequently in unschooling discussions is the idea that with natural learning, people will learn what they need to know when they need to know it.  That things will click in their minds when those things are relevant to their lives. 

This is a really basic unschooling concept that I've believed for a long time.  I've seen many examples of it, not only with my unschooled kids, but also with schooled kids and adults.  You can tell someone something a hundred times, but it's not going to mean a thing to them until it needs to mean something to them.  Sure, we all pick up random facts (that's how we make connections later when they have relevance to our lives) and people can master rote memorization, but truly involved, enthusiastic learning happens when we have a personal, intrinsic need to know the information or how to do the skill.

So, my dream last night was about that, but more specifically about how it applies to E.  This year of unschooling was trying for me.  I wrote about Freaking Out and how my confidence returned after that.  But it wasn't the same level of confidence as I've had in the past.

Mostly because she's still not reading fluently.  She's reading better than she was a year ago.  She sounds out words when she writes notes to people or makes lists.  She writes in her diary.  She tells me words she sees on street signs.  Sometimes, she sees a word and makes a comment indicating she has read it, even though she didn't even realize she was reading!  And occasionally, she reads books.  She slowly and painfully makes her way through one word at a time, until she's read a page or two.

So she can do it, but it's slow, occasional, sporadic, frustrating, and never in front of anyone outside our family.

In my dream, I put two and two together.

She's not reading fluently or frequently yet, because it's not relevant to her yet.

And there are a TON of other things that ARE relevant to her.  Every moment I spend concerned about her reading ability, I am missing out on sharing those things with her instead.

It's the school system that says reading "should" be relevant to her at this age, and that survival skills (her latest interest) "should" be relevant to her at age.... well.... actually that never comes up in a public school curriculum.   

The other part of my dream was my mind reminding me that I always have choices.

I could put her in school, and she could be shamed and teased, or tested and found to be a failure or have some sort of problem, because of her reading ability.  And maybe she'd start reading better.... or not.   

I could go buy a curriculum and have her sit down every day and try to read through tears of frustration.   And maybe she'd start reading better.... or not.

Those are legitimate options that many parents choose to make.

They are not ones I can seriously consider.

Every moment that she spent in school or crying over a reading lesson at home, would be time she could be spending learning survival skills that would never even be touched on in school.  She'd be missing out on bonding with her grandpa over emergency bags, and learning money management while comparing pocket knife prices with me on Amazon.  She'd be missing out on learning real skills that could save her life.

She'd even be missing out on writing lists of survival gear which she did last week.

E with her BoB and camping knife/fork/spoon

Yep, tears over reading lessons could cause her to not have the time or desire to spend actually writing and reading for reasons that are truly, intrinsically her own.  How ironic.







Update:  I wrote this several days ago, but hadn't posted it yet, and right after that, we got E and L a phone.  They started using their dad's old phone, which is a better phone than my bottom-of-the-line flip phone.  That doesn't bother me one bit, because I had a feeling they'd want to text, and that is much easier with a keyboard.  Sure enough, reading and writing have much more relevance to her on a daily basis for the last few days.


 


 

Drive to Collect Donations to Help Animals

E has been working on a doing a drive to raise money for the local animal shelter and a horse rescue.  She wanted to do something to help animals, so we called the animal shelter to see if she could volunteer, but they said she was too young.  So we googled for ideas of ways kids can help animals, and came across the idea to do a drive to collect donations.

She called the animal shelter and horse rescue and asked what they need.  Then she presented her idea to 4H and asked them to make it a committee. Then she did a presentation for the Humane Society and asked them to help.  She wrote a letter to businesses to ask them if she can put collection boxes in their locations, went to their locations, talked to the owners/managers, told them her idea, and got permission to put the boxes in 3 businesses.  Another business owner heard about it and offered to let her put one there, and of course there will be one at our county 4H office.

Yesterday, we went shopping for all the box decorating supplies and the kids on the committee, including L, met to decorate the boxes.  E typed up the lists of what the animal shelter and horse rescue said they need, I formatted it, and we posted them on the boxes. 

Not sure if the other kid's mom is ok with her picture being on a public blog, thus the editing.

Today we went down to the newspaper office, and she told one of the reporters all about the project, so we're hoping it will be in the paper next week.  The boxes will be up for the whole month of April, because it is Prevention of Cruelty to Animals Month.  So I'll post an update after that with a tally of what gets collected! 

We also went down to the animal shelter today, so the girls could see the animals they are collecting donations for.  Those poor dogs will probably be really glad to get some new blankets and beds!  Other than that, they look like they are cared for well, and we were glad to hear that even though they are not a no-kill shelter, they do work with various rescues to try to either adopt out or transfer the animals before even considering putting them down.  The girls REALLY wanted to take home one of the adorable kittens they had.

She has learned so much from doing this:

Public speaking/presenting skills
Cold calling skills
Making a plan and implementing it
Typing and writing (spelling, reading)
How shelters/rescues work
Volunteering
Working with others
Finding a way to make something happen when the first idea doesn't work out

Homemade paints and a thank you note

L saw a picture of a painted hand on one of my books this morning and said she wanted to paint. So we made some homemade paints, and L and Z painted pictures. L made a thank you note for her Grandma and Pop for the birthday gift they gave her.

Z's painting

L's painting

Welcome Home D!

We threw a little party for D last fall to welcome him home from his firefighting season.

This is the sign the girls and I made.  We were all so happy to see him!  The summers get long without him. 

Letter to Restaurant

E wrote her first activism letter today. We used to have a restaurant here that E really liked until it burned down. For months, we drove by it every day, watching the repairs come together, and wondering if it was going to reopen. Finally, there was an article in the paper saying they aren't reopening, and now there is an sign for a different restaurant there.

She mentions how bummed she is about this restaurant being gone at least once a week, so I suggested that she write them and tell them she wants them to come back. She mailed her letter today.*

ETA: since we were talking about writing earlier in the thread... she usually writes in capital letters. For this letter, I suggested that she do it the proper way, with caps/lower case in the right places. She had a hard time forming some of the lower case letters, because even though she's used them before, she doesn't use them as often. So I helped her with the ones she couldn't remember, but by the end of the letter, she was already remembering how to form the ones she had done in the beginning of the letter.*

*wrote on message board on May 8

Birds and Thank You Notes

A few recent natural learning moments:

Birds
A few days ago, as E and I were snuggling in bed after having just woken up, she said, "Mom, are eagles nocturnal like owls?"  She was suddenly, for no apparent reason, interested in eagles and owls and asked me a ton of questions.  So we looked them up.  We read that eagles are raptors and hunt for their food, as opposed to scavengers who find dead things.  I told her how the Bald Eagle is a symbol of America.  On a website about owls, she recognized the Barn Owl and the Snowy Owl from the movie Legend of the Guardians: The Owls of Ga'hoole.  We looked for a website that might have a game or something for kids to learn about birds.  Unfortunately, all we could find is one that used information about birds to teach spelling and reading.  She played on it for a few minutes and L enjoyed the puzzles on the site, but it wasn't really what we were looking for.  If anyone knows about a site for kids about birds, please share it!

From owlpages.com

Thank You Notes

Yesterday, we wrote thank you notes to family members and friends who had given us Hanukkah gifts.   E wrote the names on the fronts, wrote "thank you" and signed her name.  L decorated with pictures and glitter.  I wrote the words on a different piece of paper and E copied them.  By the third one, she wrote "thank" from memory, without looking at what I wrote and she was very excited about that.

 

Reading

A few weeks ago, E told her grandma, "When I'm big like mommy, I still won't know how to read."  Grandma and I encouraged her that she would definitely learn to read and that she was already getting close.  She disagreed, but then wanted to show grandma the words she knows how to write- her name, L's name, pig (I think it's so funny that this one stuck), and we helped her sound out mom and dad and a few other words. 

"You're reading!" we told her.  "You have to be able to read those words to write them!"  She thought that was pretty cool.

A few days ago, she saw and "open" sign and said, "I know what that says!  Open!"


Yesterday, we played a game like hangman, except we don't use the hangman.  I just think up words and write down the number of spaces, and they guess letters until they get the letters in that word.  I did four spaces for "open," she guessed O and E and I wrote them down.  I told her to look at it closely because it was a word she knew how to read.  She studied it for a minute and then exclaimed, "Open!  It says open!  I read it, mom!"